Talib Kweli’s cancellation incites Swine Flu

The night started out as any night did here in Minneapolis for people who go to the U of M, or just hope to one day, but with all of the excitement the last thing on anyone’s mind was a cancellation let alone a Swine pandemic caused by that very same cancellation.  For those of you not in the know a pandemic is:  bad:  i.e.  A deadly worldwide epidemic caused because global population has no protective antibodies against the virus’s antigenic shift.  An antigenic shift is when a virus’s hemagglutinin changes the virus to a new strain to evade the host’s defenses.  mariachi-band1This also happened in 1918, when tons of people (20 million worldwide) died from a pandemic called the “Spanish Flu” caused by the cancellation of a famous Mariachi band called El Fluego.  El Fluego broke up almost immediately after and all members died in a bus crash.  Bummer.  If only we could stop the cancellations of such acts then we will inevitably avoid such pandemics, yet with such high-profile artist’s and their ever growing celebrity who is to stop them from canceling a free show for drunk college students?  If you’re are thinking who I am thinking then we have the same idea, and I am thinking the Minneapolis Riot Police.riot-police All that we will have to do, as a nation against pandemics, is get a law passed that encompasses all famous celebrity and underground hip-hop artists to be detained by the Minneapolis Riot Police (exclusively) at all times before, during, and after shows, and throughout the country.  With such pressure to perform as being gassed, beaten for talking, kicked in the groin, and shot at with rubber bullets for fleeing with your arms up then the “artist” will never cancel.  You find me one “artist” who would rather be beaten with a baton and tear-gassed rather than perform a show and I will give you a million dollars.  I dare you.  Don’t even try, the amount of people who would rather do a show than the first option is Zero.  Although, with the slumping economy, no reference to ‘The Economy Sucks, So What?’, we will be unable to afford such a law to be passed.  Sadly there is no end in site.  Cancellations and pandemics go hand in hand in this armageddon to be.  Only we as consumers can stop the cancellations by supporting artists with cash, love, and most of all more cash for their efforts.  If only they had more of an incentive to be creative and positively indefatigable then we would be able to avoid such health threats as deadly influenza.  I hope that you truly consider the pros and cons of such a law and keep your heads up a Virus Specialist on Headline New just said, “We have no idea what will happen with this virus in the next few weeks, you have as much of an idea as we do.”, so I think I am heading to the hospital I may have a fever.

PLEASE NOTE: The ideas presented in this post are those of T.S. Neibeling and they are not necessarily shared by anyone else here at MindInversion (or anyone else in general, for that matter). Use your discretion when reading.


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